Monthly Archives: January 2016

Why You’re Perfect As You Are

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It was the summer of 2012. I had just gone through my third round of in vitro fertility treatments in an effort to give my husband the child he always wanted. I knew it was only a futile attempt to save our failing marriage, but for the 20+ years we'd been together, I thought I was broken. That my infertility was my fault. That if I just wanted him more, we had a child, I was a better wife, then we'd be happy, that I'd finally have the life of my dreams, the ‘perfect marriage' all of our friends were convinced we had.

I felt like a fraud. I had worked so hard to ‘have it all' – the husband, the career, the life of my dreams – and I felt like I had nothing to show for it. I was childless; my marriage was over. What's worse? I truly believed it was my fault. I was broken, you see.

So I tried harder. I went back to school to become a holistic health coach, I took on more consulting work, thinking that if I could just make more money (my husband didn't work), that I would finally be good enough. That I could afford to adopt – to ‘buy' him the child he wanted. But he didn't want to adopt and he grew more resentful of the time I spent away from home.

In a last ditch effort to save our marriage, I went to see a sex therapist – maybe she could fix me – my infertility, my low libido. At our first session, she laughed.

You don't want to have sex with your husband because there's no intimacy there – he's not meeting your needs and it sounds like he never has.'

Then she did an absolutely beautiful thing – she gave me permission. Permission to end my marriage, to walk away from the years of verbal and emotional abuse. Permission to not wear the I'm broken/victim hat anymore. Permission to be me.

It was like a light bulb went off in my head. I realized that all the things I had believed about my marriage, my life, myself were lies. And as I began to shed the false masks, I began to reexamine the false beliefs, and I began to believe her.

Do you feel like you're broken? That if you could just [fill in the blank – be better, do more, be more, change something about yourself to please someone else], life would be grand?

Here's the thing. It won't be better because there's nothing wrong with you. There's nothing to fix. I know that might sound unbelievable right now, but trust me: I have walked this path, I have felt your pain, I have picked up the broken pieces of my life, put myself back together, and I have healed.

In the video below, I explain the steps I followed to go from that broken girl I thought I was to the Goddess I know I am now. Was it easy? Not always. There were times I fell of the wagon, so to speak. Is it doable? Absolutely.

I invite you to join us for our free call series this month so you can fully and finally heal your perfectionism, release your “not enoughness” issues and Activate the Goddess I know you are! Go here to sign up:

Meet Your Inner Goddess

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With the upcoming Active Your Inner Goddess free call series, I've been getting a lot of questions about just who your Inner Goddess is and how you connect with her.

šTo me, your inner goddess is your connection with the divine feminine essence/the creator of all things (the feminine version of the masculine God, if you will). It’s the part of ourselves that connects with Goddess as we understand Her. If inner goddess doesn’t work for you, you may like to think of this as your woman’s intuition, inner guide, or feminine knowing – the inner wisdom that all women share. All of us have a connection to the feminine divine – it is within us, part of our soul. It’s your willingness to collaborate, your unbounded creativity, intuition, nurturing, inner strength, and wisdom beyond your years. It’s the feminine part of you that can heal yourself.

šMany of us have lost touch with these qualities as we have denied or repressed our inner feminine divinity. When we become disconnected from the truth of who we are we can experience a myriad of physical and psychological symptoms that manifest in our outer lives, be it endometriosis, depression, chronic pain, etc.

Why Should You Care?

šHere's the deal: At the Vancouver Peace Summit in September 2009, the Dalai Lama announced, “The world will be saved by the Western woman.” I fully believe that. But I don’t think he meant the world will be saved by women who sit there and let life pass them by; women who have gotten so out of touch with their Divine Feminine that they don’t know how to get reacquainted or even that they should. I think what the Dalai Lama was referring to was this: Women (Western or otherwise) possess powerful Feminine qualities that can heal the Earth of humankind’s misdoings. Qualities like a willingness to collaborate and share the load, unbounded creativity, intuition, nurturing, inner strength, and wisdom beyond their years. Yet many of us have lost touch with these qualities, as we have denied or repressed our Inner Feminine Divinity.

This has to stop. The world needs US– each and every one of us– to reconnect in with the core of who we are.

So how do we as women do this? How can we reconnect?

For more juicy inner goddess activation, sign up here to access my free call series.

What is Superwoman Syndrome?

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I was talking to a friend of mine over the weekend and she was lamenting about how she needed a break. In the past 5 years, she managed to work a full time job, get a graduate degree and have two kids. All on 4 hours of sleep a night, if she was lucky. And yet, this woman, who has accomplished multiple feats over the past few years, was hoping her husband didn’t notice that she hadn’t picked up the house today.

I was pretty sure I saw her Superwoman cape peeking out from under her shirt…

Everywhere you look women are struggling to juggle their roles as the perfect wife, mother, hostess, friend, volunteer, Martha Stewart home decorator, chef, chauffeur, business owner and more – leaving them feeling empty, disconnected and disillusioned. For many, the Superwoman cape has become a second skin and a part of the illusion of who we believe we MUST be in order to be love, appreciated and valued.  I’ve discovered that many of you yearn to remove the cape and release the illusion of doing it all but aren’t sure where to start.

I get it. I’ve been there. If you’ve been part of my tribe for a while, you know my story. 20 year battle with endometriosis and osteopenia. 24 year battle with an eating disorder. Entered natural menopause at 26 only to come back out at age 35. Four failed fertility treatments. Broke my heel twice in one year. Nearly died of pneumonia. I’ve been hit with more Cosmic 2x4s than I care to count. Until one day when I decided enough was enough.

It took me about a year, but I did it: I recovered from Superwoman Syndrome and I’m here to support you in doing the same. So what is Superwoman Syndrome?

Do Any of These Sound Familiar?

If you answered yes to any of those, You, my friend, have Superwoman Syndrome!

But fear not! You can hang up your cape! The symptoms you are experiencing are a message from your Inner Goddess, or Intuition, letting you know that you have forgotten the truth of who you are.  Your symptoms act as messengers on your journey with the intent to redirect you in choosing a different path. A path filled with self-love, self-acceptance, joy and inner peace – a sacred place of BE-ing where your inner light, life essence can shine brightly.

But where do you start? Are you ready to hang up your Superwoman Cape? Are you ready to leave your fear, feelings of unworthiness and “not enoughness” behind? If so, I invite you to join us for our free call series this month so you can fully and finally heal your Superwoman Syndrome, release your “not enoughness” issues and Activate the Goddess I know you are! Go here to sign up:


You Are So Much More Than Enough

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My best friend gave me this bracelet for Christmas because she knows of my past struggles. She knows that sometimes we all need a reminder. You are so much more than enough….


The holidays are a difficult time of year for many of us, and this Christmas marked the first time in 6 years that I didn’t cry. Christmas was my father’s favorite holiday and, since his passing 6.5 years ago, it has served as a reminder of him. But this year was different. This year I made a decision to celebrate the holiday season like I used to do when I was a child. I went to see the Christmas trees at Festival of Trees. I drug my boyfriend out in single digit weather to see the botanical gardens lit up with Christmas lights. I gave myself permission not to decorate my house or cook a ‘real’ Christmas dinner. Instead, I made bison burgers, wilted kale salad and sweet potato oven-baked fries with my best friend. And never once did I think, “I should be doing more to celebrate the holidays.”

But often, the holidays seem to remind us of how “not enough” we are. How we should be “do-ing” the holiday season, with all its fanfare and parties, better somehow. We should make more cookies, have a bigger or better decorated tree, out-do the neighbors with our lawn décor, buy our kids better presents or more of them …

A few years ago I had a client who could not seem to get over the “not enoughness” issues that the holidays seem to trigger in her. She pushed herself so hard that she ended up in the hospital and wasn’t even able to enjoy all of the Christmas food she painstakingly prepared, the house she decorated to be worthy of landing on the pages of Martha Stewart’s magazine. She just knew everyone would have a horrible time if she didn’t do everything they were used to. I knew her kids and her grandkids. The reality was this: they didn’t care about the Christmas decorations or the extra pies. Yes, the enjoyed them, but what they really valued was having the whole family together at Christmas. June could have easily saved herself a trip to the hospital that year, but her Inner Mean Girl wasn’t having anything less than a “perfect” Christmas.

In the Facebook group, we’ve been discussing what we are leaving in 2015 and what we will create in 2016. Many of us talked about leaving our fears behind, our feelings of unworthiness, and most of all, our “not enoughness” in 2015.

How about you?

If so, I invite you to join us for our free call series this month so you can fully and finally release your “not enoughness” issues and Activate the Goddess I know you are! Go here to sign up.