Monthly Archives: January 2017

I Fill Myself First

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January is over, and I couldn't be more excited. Although I love January and the idea of new beginnings and New Year's, I really look forward to February. To me, February is when the ball really starts rolling for goals I’ve set for myself in the New Year.

A few years ago, my friend and colleague, Christine Arylo, declared February international self-love month. She marked February 13 as international self-love day. No, it's not about narcissism. It's about truly learning to love, accept, and appreciate the woman you see in the mirror. While most of us associate February with Valentine's Day, a day when we celebrate our love for others, I loved Christine's idea of including yourself on that list of loved ones – of actually taking time to love, and celebrate, you.

As a result, for the past few years, I too have dubbed February my month of self-love. I've always tried to do something for myself – and for you – to help us learn to love and accept ourselves just as we are. To help us be more compassionate with ourselves. To help us fill ourselves up.

You can’t serve from your reserves (aka an empty cup).

One of my favorite poems/blog posts on this topic was Lissa Rankin’s I Fill Myself First: A Declaration (sadly, it has gone to cyber heaven and is no longer available). But I was able to find one of my favorite quotes from that blog post:

You have SUCH a big heart. I know you want to help so many. But please remember – you can’t serve up water from a dried up well. That notion you have that you must give until you’re depleted and that doing so makes you a valuable, caring person worthy of love and respect, it’s just dead wrong. You’re a valuable caring person worthy of love and respect because you have within you a piece of Divinity (moi!) and that makes you inherently valuable. Try this new mantra instead: I fill myself first so I can heal the world. ~ Lissa Rankin, MD

How will you love, appreciate, and celebrate yourself this month? I just finished the 7-day Love Your Body, Nourish Your Temple challenge. (I wanted to kick off February with a bang, so I started in January. :)) But no worries if you're just now learning about this, you can still sign up for the 7-day challenge here. Because I really wanted to kick February, the month of self-love, off with a bang, I decided to hold a call for you to share all of my favorite ways to love your body, take exquisite care of you, and ensure that you are well nourished. I invite you to join me on February 1 for my free call: the 7 Principles of Being a Well-Nourished Woman. On this call, I will be giving you activities and exercises you can do every day during the month of February to improve your relationship with your body and yourself. I hope you will join me. You can sign up here.

New Moon in Aquarius

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This continues a series of posts on working with Moon energy. Each New Moon and Full Moon, I will post suggestions for working with that archetype and harness the energy of the Moon’s cycle.

New Moon Energy

The new moon is a time of new beginnings, a time when you plant the seeds you wish to harvest over the next month. Yet, do not neglect to let go of what no longer serves before you plant those seeds. It does no good to plant seeds in a barren desert. So the night before each new moon, in the dark of the moon, I like to hold a release ceremony. Some questions to ponder might be:

  • What do you need to release before moving forward with this new moon cycle?
  • What patterns have you been holding on to that no longer serve?

Once you have let go of the old, it’s time to set your intentions for this moon cycle. I do this on the night of the New Moon. Some questions to ponder might be:

  • What do I wish to create over the next month (from New Moon to New Moon)?
  • What do I need to allow my creations to come into light?

New Moon in Aquarius

Aquarians have the unique properties of being both inquisitive (Aquarius is an Air sign) and dreamers (more of a water energy). They love to explore new things, people, and places. As such, Aquarians are great at starting new things,  finding new meaning/perspective to existing and new issues, and thinking outside of the box. They are creative and inventive and seem to have an innate ability to deal with the “technical stuff.” 

You can add the energy of Aquarius to your New Moon reflections by asking yourself the following questions:

  • What situation in my life would benefit from a perspective shift or a new way of thinking? 
  • What dream is calling me right now? What seeds do I want to plant in the New Year?
  • How can I be more open to the possibilities?
  • What doorways are being opened for me right now?
  • How can I create a positive shift in my life?

Have fun working with Aquarius in your January reflections! It should be illuminating and a little mind-blowing. 🙂

 

Coming Home to Yourself

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“I’m thinking about quitting my job,” a client said to me, “and I’m scared to death.” She’s been an accountant for 25 years. It’s all she’s ever known, career wise – at least since she entered adulthood. And yet, at 45, she’s seriously considering giving it up. Why? It’s not who she feels like she is anymore – not who she wants to be, moving forward.

“Am I just having a midlife crisis?” she asked me.

“No,” I reassured her. In the year we’ve been working together, I’ve gotten to know her pretty well. “You’re just finally coming home to yourself.”

When I start working with my private clients, I lead them through a mini-VIP Day where we go through what got them to this point, what they most want, and then set goals for our time working together. A year ago, I asked Sherri what she most wanted to do in life, what her big dream was – no holds barred – and she answered without hesitation, “I want to write romance novels.” You might have had a similar thought when it came to my next question, “Why are you an accountant then?” She shrugged. “Family business.” Her father is an accountant, as was his father. Two of her siblings are accountants. It was just assumed she would follow along in the family footsteps, and so she did.

But after working together for a year, Sherri’s beginning to understand a few things about herself: she actually doesn’t like accounting. She’s good at it; she’s made a great living at it; yet, it doesn’t nourish her Soul. And so, she’s finding herself in this place of not knowing what to do or where to go. She asking herself the tough question: “Who would I be if I wasn’t an accountant?” The beautiful thing is that she’s finally giving herself permission to answer that question. Is it scary? Absolutely. But she realizes that if she doesn’t allow herself to explore that question, she’ll always feel stagnant, less than, like she’s missing out on something bigger.

As we come to the end of the first month of 2017, I invite you to reflect on where you are, where you’re going, and where you want to be. 2017 is a year of new beginnings, and for some of you, it might be the year you finally come home to yourself – whatever that means for you.

If you’re feeling resistance to that idea of coming home to yourself or to even the idea of exploring what that might mean for you, I want to share something with you:

I give you permission. I give you permission to take care of yourself while you figure things out.

Facing questions about identity and life purpose aren’t easy. Many of us struggle with the idea of even allowing ourselves to explore those questions.

But know this:

If you want a little more support around answering these tough questions, I invite you to sign up for my free 7-Day Love Your Body, Nourish Your Temple Challenge. For me, it all comes back to self-care: you need to take exquisite care of you as you explore coming home to yourself, getting to know yourself and what you truly want in life. Come and be supported. Join us.

 

Finding Balance Amidst the Chaos

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January: new month; New Year – a time of new beginnings. Yet, on the heels of a rough 2016 and coming off of Mercury Retrograde, many of my clients are wondering: when is it going to get better? When will I be free of all of that baggage I thought I left behind in 2016?

Breathe.

2017 is the year of big dreams. It’s time to plant those seeds for everything you want to manifest in your life – even if you’re not quite sure what that is yet. But, it’s not going to happen overnight – you’ve got 11.5 more months left in 2017 after all.

Instead of trying to rush things and manifest everything you want right now, what if you could just open to the possibilities? What if you could just hold space for what is to come? Easier said than done for those of us who have a tendency to want to control everything, but stop for a moment and consider this: What if January, this time of new beginnings, is really a time to open up to what is to come? To make time for yourself to ensure you are ready for whatever 2017 may hold for you?

As many of you know, I rang in my New Year in Belize. It was with mixed feelings that I got on that plane home on January 2nd. On the one hand, I didn’t want to leave Belize – the easy-going way of life, the soothing sound of the ocean, the 80 degree weather. On the other hand, I was excited to begin my 2017 and creating my dreams for the year. I knew I needed to leave Belize and come home for that to happen.

As I was on the plane home (actually 4 planes and a boat ride!), I spent time reflecting on the lessons I learned in Belize. From the gorgeous waterfalls to zip lining over a rainforest to visiting the Mayan ruins Xanantunich to getting stuck in the middle of the ocean on a boat in the pitch black of night and praying I would make it back to the little island we were staying on, I kept getting the same message: Balance.

But what is Balance and, when it sometimes seems so elusive, how do you find it? While I sometimes wish I could just click my heels together, say “Serenity now!” and have that work, I know that finding balance amidst the chaos of life is completely up to me and my choices. Yes, life happens. Appointments get scheduled for the wrong time, miscommunications occur with family and friends, you get a flat tire on the way to work, [insert stressor], but you can still find your way back to balance.

For me, it all comes down to self-care. Regardless of what’s going on in life, I know I feel a lot healthier and find it easier to handle life’s many challenges when I am taking good care of myself. So my challenge for January is to find out what self-care works best for me. What makes me feel more balanced? I am playing with this and trying new things. I still have my morning power hour (with the addition of the morning yoga I added in Belize), but I am playing with my evening routine and daily “Goddess sanity breaks.” Some evenings I go to the gym, sometimes I journal, some days I even go rock climbing (indoors for now until the two feet of snow melts!). I am taking January to find my center, my balance point.

Each Sunday I reflect on how it went – what I want to keep, what I want to toss – not with any air of self-criticism, but more an air of self-inquiry.

If this is something you’d like to explore with me, I invite you to join my 7-Day Love Your Body, Nourish Your Temple Challenge. We start January 23rd, but you can join at any time. 7 days of audios and workbooks to help you find your balance. Join us!

Full Moon in Cancer

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This is part of a series of posts on working with Moon energy. Each New Moon and Full Moon, I will post suggestions for working with that archetype and harness the energy of the Moon’s cycle.

Full Moon Energy

The full moon is the time of a birth, a time when the seeds you planted at the New Moon prior (approximately 2 weeks ago) come to fruition. So if you set goals and intentions at the New Moon, now is a great time to bring them out and evaluate your progress.

  • What do you need to do between now and the next New Moon to birth your intentions?
  • What needs to happen in your life for that to occur?
  • What do you need to finish up?
  • What do you need to let go of?

Full Moon in Cancer

As a water sign, Cancers tend to be very emotional. Yet, much of this lies in a deep well under the surface. They need to feel secure and protected to open up. When they do feel safe, they soar – they are insightful, caring, loyal, dependable, adaptive and highly intuitive. If you're not part of their “in crowd,” however,  they may appear indecisive or moody because they don't trust you enough to bare their souls to you. 

So what does this mean for working with the Full Moon energy? You can add the energy of Cancer to your Full Moon reflections by asking yourself the following questions:

  • Am I being honest about what I'm feeling or is there something hidden beneath the surface (shadow side) that I won't let out?
  • What are my emotions telling me right now?
  • Where have I been ignoring my intuition? 
  • What is my intuition telling me to create/focus on right now? 
  • Where am I not feeling safe? What do I need to create so I can feel safe to soar to new heights?

Enjoy working with the Full Moon energy in Cancer! It should be a very intuitive time for all of us.

Diving into the Discomfort 

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Walk the Path, Wisdom Blog | 2 Comments

I recently lead a session of Woman Unleashed online retreat where Amber Kuileimailani Bonnici and I were taking about using your negative emotions as fuel or a place to step off from rather than allowing them to drag you down. I call this process diving into the discomfort.

You might be wondering why on earth you'd want to dive into your anger, sadness, or feelings of betrayal. After all, we're trying to avoid those negative feelings, right? In short, no. Negative emotions are part of life, while they may be uncomfortable, they have much to teach us.

I recently spent a glorious week on a little island off the coast of Belize. My last day on the island left me feeling depressed because I didn't want to go home. Instead of wallowing in my depression over my imminent departure, I asked myself, “Why am I feeling this way?” The answer: I didn't want to have to return to the busyness of life back home – I was enjoying my peace and solitude. No cell service, no email, no deadlines. It was bliss. So I dove deeper: “How can I keep this state of peace as I move back into life at home?” One of the things I loved so much about my time on the island was my daily morning sunrise yoga sessions. I started each morning on the beach doing a few yoga poses and ended with journaling and my morning meditation. I do yoga every day, by usually not first thing in the morning. This, however, is a relatively easy addition to my morning routine. My hope is that starting my day with yoga will help me keep some of that peaceful feeling island living inspired in me.

So when you find yourself feeling an emotion you aren't too fond of, I invite you to dive a little deeper with these reflections:

  1. What am I feeling? Write it out, draw it out. Emotions want to be expressed.
  2. Why am I feeling this way? Don't think you know the answer and let ego take over here. Allow whatever is going to bubble up just bubble up.
  3. What is it that I really need here? Or what is it that I really want? Again, don't think about it. Just allow whatever wants to come up to come up.
  4. What are my emotions telling me to do here? What needs to be expressed/ changed/ let go of..? This question is critical as I see our emotions as superpowers for change. This is where emotion inspires action.
  5. Is there anything else I need to know? Anything else that needs to be expressed? If so, allow that to come up as well.

Take your time with this process. Allow your emotions to be a guide for you to deepen your understanding of yourself. And most of all, approach this exercise with the air of curiosity. There is no judgement here. Enjoy learning about yourself, nourishing yourself, and truly loving and accepting yourself as you welcome your emotions into your life.

If you want to learn more about how to do this, I invite you to sign up for my free 7-Day Love Your Body, Nourish Your Temple challenge, where we go through each of my 7 Principles of being a Well-Nourished Woman. Sign up here

Much love!