Category Archives: Body Love

Learning to Love Yourself Like It’s Your Job

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

I've been reading Danielle LaPorte's new book White Hot Truth. In it, she has a chapter entitled, Love Yourself Like It's Your Job. I thought to myself, “what a great way to put it.” 

On my journey back to self-love and body love, I have learned that loving myself needs to be up there on the priority list – preferably in the first spot. Why? Because: 1) it's my job to make sure I get my needs met and 2) I cannot serve from my reserves or I get really [sick/ depleted/ exhausted/ angry/ bitter/ resentful/ insert word or emotion that describes you when you've been over-doing and over-giving]. 

That is why I am so excited about today's podcast episode, where I talk a little bit more about my journey back to self-love. It is a journey, a path that I am continually refining. I hope it serves you.

If you want more self-love and body love, I invite you to join The Well-Nourished Goddess on-line event. You can sign up here: http://TheWellNourishedGoddess.com.

 

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I’m Asking You to Show Up for Yourself

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Walk the Path, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Dear beautiful, fabulous, wonderfully–talented goddess,

I have a question for you:

I know that you're busy. I know that life sometimes feels a bit overwhelming. I know that you have so many roles, responsibilities, and obligations. I know that sometimes you just wish you could run away from your life. I know that sometimes you doubt whether you're good enough to handle it all or good (insert appropriate inner mean girl rant) enough period.

I know the days/weeks/sometimes months go by before you even start to consider your own needs. I know that sometimes you skip meals and forget to eat because you're just that busy, or maybe sometimes at the end of a really long day, you dive headfirst into the Ben & Jerry's ice cream just because it seems like a good idea and it seems like a comfort. I know that sometimes you wish you could just have more control over your life, or just fewer things on your to do list. 

I know that sometimes you just wish you didn’t have to be the one who has to take care of everything and everyone. I know that you dream of vacationing to exotic destinations and, maybe sometimes, dream of what it might be like to just run away and stay there and have someone take care of your every need for a change.

Here's what I want you to know: you are beautiful and wonderful and absolutely perfectly imperfect just the way you are. I wish that you could see yourself as I see you, rather than judging the woman in the mirror yet again. But I know that you don't always see things that way. Sometimes you see yourself as flawed, broken, or needing fixing. Sometimes you just wish it was your turn to catch a break, a good night’s sleep, or whatever it is that your heart desires. And I know that sometimes you feel like that's never going to happen.

I'm here today because I have a favor to ask of you. It's a favor for me and, really, for you. Here's what I know: you are absolutely worthy of your own time, your own care, your own nurturing, and that your dreams do matter. So for today, and preferably all of your days, 

I'm asking you to take care of yourself and fill your own cup before you fill everybody else's. I'm asking for you to just once put yourself first. Because here's the deal: if you don't take care of yourself and put you first, you won't be able to show up for all those that you serve. Your kids need you, your parents need you, your siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, family, friends, clients, and colleagues need you. We all need you. But we need you to be you – not the drained, depleted, overspent version of you. We need you to be the best version of you. No  – I'm not judging you for not showing up for yourself. I'm writing this to myself as much as anyone else.

But I want to you consider this question: What would life be like if you started living that way – serving from your overflow and not from your reserves? How would you be better able to show up for yourself and for others?

Here's the deal: you have permission to be who you are. And here’s my wish for you: one of these days, maybe not today, I hope that you're in a place where you are finally ready. You're ready to claim you – all parts of you – no matter what you actually think about those parts – good, bad, indifferent. Because when you can do this, when you can learn to claim, accept, love you for who you are just as you are right now in this moment, then you have conquered the last frontier. Nothing can hold you back. Because you see, once you realize you're the one that's been holding you back all this time, you're free.

So I'm asking you to show up for yourself. Five, 10, 15 minutes a day. (Check out today’s video for some ideas on how to do this.) Try it and you’ll realize the feeling of showing up for you is addicting. And may I repeat: you’re worth it.

If you are ready to show up for you, I invite you to join us for The Well-Nourished Goddess: The Art of Sacred Self-Care. 21 experts all talking about how they show up for themselves on a daily basis despite their responsibilities. We would love to see you there. You can join us here:  TheWellNourishedGoddess.com.

What Has Been the Most Important Lesson You’ve Learned on Your Healing Journey?

By | Body Love, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

I recently had a client ask me about the most important lesson I've learned on my journey to reclaiming body love and healing my eating disorder. This was a tough one that I had to give some thought. 

But what it came down to was this: my journey to developing an eating disorder started when I found out I had endometriosis and couldn't have children. Thus, my eating disorder was a form of self-punishment. I developed an eating disorder, in part, because I blamed myself for my infertility. Because I blamed myself, I didn't see myself as a loveable person so I wasn't taking care of myself or my body. In today's podcast, I walk you through the biggest lesson I've learned and the steps I took to start loving and taking care of me again. I hope it serves you.

 

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Sticky Note Challenge!

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Yellow  leaf of a reminder on a white background

In honor of September, my birthday month, I always like to do something for you to give back. This year, I'm doing 2 things:

  1. I am bringing back the sticky note challenge
  2. I am hosting The Well-Nourished Goddess Online Event

Why? Because the most frequent questions I get asked are: 1) how do you learn to love and accept yourself, and 2) how do you make time for yourself in your busy day so that you don't feel stressed/overwhelmed/exhausted/depleted and can actually show up for your loved ones from a place of love and gratitude rather than bitterness and resentment? The sticky note challenge should help with the former and the telesummit, the latter of those two.

One of the first things I started doing on my journey back to self-love and body love was the sticky note challenge. Will it solve all of your problems? No. But these simple little sticky notes will make a huge difference.

Have you ever heard of Operation Beautiful? The mission of Operation Beautiful is to post anonymous notes in public places for other people to find – notes that would brighten their day. Something like, “You are Beautiful.”

I want to use this idea to create sticky notes for ourselves. Why? Because brain science research indicates that negative messages are perceived as 5 times more powerful than positive ones by our brains. So we need to surround ourselves with positivity to survive day-to-day life!

For the next month, I challenge you to make a different sticky note each day. Ideally you would make several sticky notes that contain that phrase each day and put them places where you (and others) will see them. Places like your wallet, purse, office cubicle, stairwell, bathroom, a random aisle at Walmart, etc. As a psychologist, I know that the more we see certain messages, the more we start to believe them. So these notes will have a dual purpose: they’ll help you feel better about yourself and they will help others feel better about themselves as well.

Here are the rules:

  1. head over to my Facebook page or my Well-Nourished Goddess free Facebook group to find the sticky note of the day or just look on the blog under the Category Goddess Inspirations or the September 2016 archive (feel free to create your own inspirational messages if what I posted doesn't resonate with you)
  2. write out your own sticky note and put it where you can see it during the day 
  3. write out sticky notes for others and let them be surprised when they find them, and
  4. take a picture of your sticky notes and share them on social media with the hashtag #stickynotechallenge

I love sticky note month!

Explore Your Passion and Purpose and Reclaim Body Love

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments


Reclaiming Body Love can sometimes feel overwhelming. I get that. A listener recently asked me to share my top 3 tips/things I needed to do to reclaim body love. This was challenging, but I managed to narrow it down to three!

  1. I had to stop the comparison game – for me, this meant enacting a media ban and shying away from people and situations that I knew would trigger me for a while. I also had to replace my negative self-talk with positive self-talk.
  2. I had to focus on why I am here – big picture Life Purpose stuff – rather than on the things I didn't like about myself or my body.
  3. I had to learn to love and accept all of me for who I was.

 

In today's podcast, I walk you through all three of these steps. If you want help on #2, I invite you to join my 5-Day Explore Your Passion and Purpose challenge. You can join here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheWellNourishedGoddess/ 

Stay tuned for more on #3 next week!

 

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Don’t Mess with My Imperfection

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I was talking with a client the other day who was struggling with moving forward on a big project at work. Why? 1) She was afraid she'd somehow “mess it up,” and 2) she was afraid that people would then judge her for her “imperfect” product.

As my business coach likes to tell me, “Imperfect action is better than no action.” I think this advice can be applied to reclaiming body love as well. Sometimes our inner critic takes over and prevents us from moving forward.

In today's podcast, I talk about what to do when your inner perfectionist is getting in the way of you taking forward action. I hope it serves you!

 

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Why Paying It Forward Can Be An Important Tool on Your Healing Journey

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Some days life is going great; and some days you feel like a fraud/feel like you've taken 20 giant steps back/wish you could crawl back in bed. I get it. I've been there.

One of the things I used to do (and still do today because I love doing it) when I was having one of those days/weeks/months was to pay it forward. Each day I would do one thing nice for another woman to help increase her Body Love. Some days I would give a compliment to every woman I saw. Some days I would leave sticky notes with Body Love messages on them in random places in my workplace. Some days I would just give a big smile to everyone. What I noticed was this: not only did I brighten other people’s days, but I felt really good about me. What a great way to reinforce your Body Love! It’s time to pay it forward!

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Planning For Those Moments When Life Takes You Off Track

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

I wish I could tell you that once you've healed – whatever the struggle may be – that you'll never have problems again. That everything will always be rainbows and puppy dogs and butterflies. But, let's face it. Life happens. Your mother-in-law comes to town, your boss makes you work overtime to get a big project done, the holidays send you into a tailspin. 

I can't prevent life from happening any more than you can. But what I can help you do is make a plan for when life happens. I can help you figure out what your triggers are and what to do when you: 1) know they are about to occur, and/or 2) they've already happened. You can do this. I've got your back. In today's podcast, I walk you through this process. I hope it serves you. Much love!

 

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Dealing with the Negative Emotions Healing Can Bring Up

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Healing is a journey; a process. As much as we might wish it was a quick fix; it's not. Sometimes we feel great about where we are on our healing journey, and sometimes it feels like we just took 3 giant steps back to where we came from.

Several months after I started my healing journey with anorexia, I met a man who was recovering from bulimia. We thought we could help each other, support each other. It didn't work out that way, however. He ended up just being a trigger for me. I stopped doing all of the things that had helped me to that point in my recovery and I relapsed. I felt miserable; like a failure, a fraud. I had to end the relationship and get back on the road to healing. It wasn't easy – it certainly didn't feel good – but it was necessary for me to continue on my healing journey. 

In today's podcast, I discuss some of those pivotal healing tools that I used on my journey of healing my relationship with my body – the first time and after I relapsed. I hope they serve you.

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