inner wisdom

The Worth It Quotient

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | 2 Comments

I had an “aha” moment the other day. I was doing my Sunday afternoon planning for the week ahead and answering the weekly prompts in my Leonie Dawson daily diary planner (love that thing!). I had an inspiration to flip through the entire year and look at what I seemed to be asking myself for most often. Without fail, when I asked myself the question, “What do I most want to give myself this week?” every single answer had to do with my own time.

For an entire year, my intuitive responses have been telling me that I needed to give myself my own time. Clearly, I haven't been doing so or I wouldn't be asking for it every single week. Thus, the big “aha” moment: If I don't give myself the precious resource of my own time, I'm going to keep asking for it. The feeling of never having enough time for me isn't going to go away. It will just stay there on paper, unfulfilled, as it has done for the entire year.

I followed that aha moment with meditation. I asked my guides for help. What they shared with me was interesting. My higher self – my inner goddess – said to me: You need to develop a “worth it” quotient. If your most precious resource right now is your own time, then you'd better make sure the way you are spending that time feels like it's worth it to you. Not to your partner, not to your best friend, not to your coach, not to anybody else, but to you. You are the one you're asking for your own time. This is your next challenge and your next growth edge. (See today's video for more on creating more time for yourself.)

Of course, I wanted to argue with my higher self. Not everything that I do every single day is going to feel “worth it.” After all, I have a day job and online business to run. I still have to do my chores, like doing the laundry, making dinner, and taking out the trash. Are all of these supposed to feel “worth it?” Her response? For everything you do, ask yourself the question: “Is this worth my time?” If it is, great, go for it. But if it's not, give yourself permission to say no and see what happens. Also give yourself permission for the answer to vary over time. Some days one task might seem worth it whereas other days, it may not. And that's okay.

Is everything every day going to feel “worth it?” I doubt it. After all, we're human beings living a human experience. But I hope that this “worth it” experiment helps me shed some light on the answer to that question:

We have five months left in the year. There's a lot going on right now energetically speaking – I'm feeling it, my clients are feeling it, everyone I'm talking to is feeling it. Perhaps we should harness the upcoming energy of these two eclipses in the month of August to help us gain some clarity. What would happen if you asked yourself the question: is this worth it? You're “worth it quotient” may not look like mine. Maybe it's not time that your greatest resource right now. Maybe it's money. Maybe it's your sanity. But what would it look like if you approached your day-to-day tasks with that curiosity in mind? Is this – whatever it is I'm doing – worth my greatest resource – whatever that greatest resource may be?

In other words, does task/time=resource or is task/time<resource or maybe even is task/time>resource? 

 

How to Handle Your Inner Mean Girl

By | Body Love, Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | 2 Comments

Several years ago a good friend confronted me about my dirty little secret: I had an eating disorder, one I had been in denial about for over 2 decades. After a week of arguing with him, I finally admitted that I had a problem. It was time to face the facts: not only did I not love the woman in the mirror, I flat out loathed her. I felt betrayed by my body after decades of battling endometriosis and osteopenia (a side effect of one of the treatments for the endometriosis), and four failed rounds of fertility treatments. I had desperately wanted the “American dream” – 2 kids, a dog, a beautiful home with a white picket fence – but my infertility had put a severe damper on my plans. So I had been subconsciously punishing my body for her perceived betrayal by exercising too much and eating too little.

After finally admitting I had an eating disorder, I threw myself into healing with a fervent passion. I was determined to “beat” my eating disorder. And I did. But it wasn't easy and it didn't happen overnight. Why? I kept self-sabotaging. At some level, my inner mean girl (aka inner critic) didn't want me to get better. It served her to believe that I would never be good enough. After all, if you set your expectations really low, and you fail, you haven't lost much…

Yet, I was torn because I wanted to heal so I could help other women heal their relationships with food, their bodies, and themselves. I wanted to be a beacon of hope, not a beacon of failure. That meant I had to confront my inner mean girl and get to the bottom of why she: 1) didn't want to heal, and 2) believed I wasn't good enough to be worthy of my dreams. But I had no idea where to start.

One day as I was journaling, I had an epiphany: what if, instead of buying into her nonsense, I confronted her? What if I actually dialogued with her and tried to get to the bottom of her meanness? So I did. What I found surprised me:

In fact, the exact opposite was true: she wanted me to succeed. But she was so afraid of failure, she built walls “of protection” around herself – so many walls that success was highly unlikely. Furthermore, she didn't mean to self-sabotage; she just didn't want to get hurt … again. As the layers of memories and pain were revealed, she began to soften, to hope, to let go. I had to go through this process several times to really get it to stick, but the good news is that I rarely am confronted by my inner mean girl these days. Yes, I still get scared, but I allow myself to ask for help when I need it and have opened myself up enough to receive it that I rarely let fear of failure (or success or having what I want) stop me these days. 

In today's podcast, I walk you through this process. I hope it serves you:

Download this episode (right click and save)

And if you are ready to dive a little deeper with your inner mean girl and would like some support, I just re-opened enrollment for my 7-week group coaching program, The Nourished Temple. You can learn more about it here.

Create Sacred Space to Nourish Your Soul

By | Goddess Wisdom, Walk the Path, Wisdom Blog | One Comment

Beautiful woman sitting in meditation in lotus pose with her hands raised up in summer and spring colors with cosmic space in her heart illustration, banner or poster idea, watercolor style

As I get summers off from teaching, Summer is usually the time I ramp up my online business. I go into “get things done” mode. I host telesummits, create new products and services, and revise my business plan for the remainder of the year.

But after a long and stressful Spring and Summer semester, I declared June my month of Self-Care. I worked 4-hour days, rediscovered painting in the Woman Unleashed Online Retreat, and spent quite a bit of time journaling. I thought that by the end of June, I would come out of my slump and know which direction I wanted to take with my online business.

Yet, when I checked in with myself during my New Moon meditation, I got the following message:

“You need to keep coming back to you. You need this Sacred retreat time to ground and center. Take as long as you need. There is no rush. Allow this unfolding to happen on its own time.”

Huh. Guess I won’t be charging ahead with my business plan this month after all.

As I’ve been participating in Woman Unleashed, I’ve learned a lot about myself. I learned that, to some extent, I’m still a people pleaser. I’ve been listening to the advice of others rather than my own intuition. I’ve been following someone else’s definition of success rather than focusing on what makes me happy. I’ve been holding myself back for fear of stepping on someone's toes or offending someone. It’s like I’ve been waiting for someone to give me permission to be myself. But none of that is honoring me. So I started asking myself some tough questions:

  • What do I consider to be my greatest strengths? Weaknesses?
  • How have I been hiding/not be-ing true to me?
  • Who do I think I need permission from and why?
  • What is my Soul calling me to do? What is my Mission?
  • What am I afraid will happen if I answer my Soul’s Calling? If I walk firmly forward in my Mission?

I don’t know that I have all of the answers to these questions yet. It is, after all, a process, an unfolding. What I know is this: my Soul is calling for me to continue my retreat. To create sacred space and nourish myself. As I allow this unfolding to occur, the next steps – for my business and my life – will appear.

June was my month of self-care. July is about self-trust and listening to my intuition. It’s about re-birthing me. The funny thing is that I do I reading for the entire year every January. I write down the cards I’ve pulled – one for my business and one for myself – for each month and then refer to them again at the beginning of that particular month.

After I completed my New Moon meditation and received the message that I need to stay in retreat mode, I referred 2016-07-05 09.46.42back to the reading I had done for July at the beginning of the year. I had pulled Nemetona from Doreen Virtue’s deck for my business and Transcend from Ariel Spilsbury’s 13 Moons Oracle Cards for myself. Huh. Quite prophetic, isn’t it? It’s funny how that works out. Over 6 months since I did the reading or even thought about it, and yet, my Soul knew even then that I would need this Sacred healing time to recover, replenish, and fill my cup.

The inner woman is the source of healing. The inner woman is the source of silence. The inner woman is the source of love. The inner woman is the source of belongingness with life. Embracing the inner woman is to discover our inner roots and wings.” Swami Dhyan Giten

It’s time to create Sacred Space to nourish my Soul.

Manifesting Your Heart’s Desires

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Last time we talked about the importance of getting out of your own way to truly manifest your heart's desire. But there is more to it than that. I have found that these 7 steps are crucial to getting what you really want in life.

Dr. Mary’s 7 Steps to Manifest What You Desire

  • Figure out what it is that you actually want – when I decided to start dating after my divorce, I made a list (phrased positively) of what I wanted in a partner. While that may sound simple, it actually took me months to really and truly finalize that list. I would go out on a date and then add something. I would go out with another man and cross something off or rephrase it because it wasn’t presenting itself the way I wanted it to. Three pages and about a full year later, I had my “final” list.
  • Figure out why you want it – this is as important as step 1. What will you do with X [insert what you want]. How would it make your life better? “Because” is not a reason. It also needs to be fairly specific. “To be happy” doesn’t cut it either. If you are trying to manifest your Soul Mate, think long and hard about why. Are you trying to fend off loneliness? Looking for a man to take care of you? Want a partner you can share your life with? For the Universe to deliver, your motivations need to be clear and they need to be of good intention. Wanting to “out do” someone or use them to feel better about yourself won’t work.
  • Believe you’re worth having it – This is the biggest stumbling block I see. You can get specific about what you want and why you want it, but until you believe you are worth it, you will not manifest it. A few years back, I had a friend who wanted to manifest a white Jaguar convertible. I asked her why and she shrugged. She just decided one day that it was something she wanted. That’s all fine and good, but it doesn’t cut it. As I started probing, we got to the bottom of it. To her, having that car would mean that she had “arrived,” that she was a person of worth. Now there may be better ways to prove your worth and I wasn’t sold on a car being that proof, but that’s a conversation for another day. The moral of the story is this: you have to believe you’re worth it. Until she fully believed this, she didn’t manifest her car. Once she convinced herself she was worth it, she got her car in less than one week.
  • Ask for what you want – Yes, you actually have to ask. Do not skip this step. Don’t assume God/Goddess/Universe knows what you want, especially when you keep changing your mind. And if you are asking for something and not getting it, go back to steps 1-3 and make sure you are crystal clear about what you want, why you want it, and believe that you deserve it. For more on asking for what you want, see today’s video. If that doesn’t work, go to step 5.
  • Take action, but not in a forceful way – after you ask, you have to show Universe you are serious. For example, if you want to manifest a trip to Costa Rica, start looking at how much you’d have to save up to go where you want to go. Check out a book about traveling to Costa Rica from the library. Make sure your passport is valid. Or, let’s say you want to manifest your Soul Mate. You need to get out of the house – go to places where you can meet new people, join a meet up group, get on a dating site, etc. You get the idea. You don’t want to control everything, but you do need to take a few steps in the right direction.
  • Get out of your own way – This means two things to me: 1) ask for what you want and then let it go. You have to stop trying to control the who/what/when/how/why of whatever it is that you are asking for. 2) be prepared for it to show up a little bit differently than you thought you wanted. My friend who wanted a Jaguar wanted a brand new one, but she couldn’t afford one. Instead, she manifested a used, but in very good condition, white Jaguar convertible that was within her budget.
  • Wait for it – Universe doesn’t do well with deadlines. Occasionally I have been able to manifest a certain thing in a certain time frame – the more emotion I put behind my request, the faster I tend to get it – but typically Universe is on its own time schedule. For example, when I decided I wanted to start dating again, I was told “You’re not ready.” I probed further and asked when I might expect to meet the man who met my 3-page list of requirements and was told, “December.” I promptly forgot that I had this conversation with the Universe. I took Summer off of the dating scene, but when Fall came around, I decided to try again. I dated off and on. October was disastrous, as was November. But low and behold, December 5, I met him. Two weeks later, I remembered my conversation with the Universe. Ahh… yes. Universe most certainly operates on its own time.

Happy Manifesting!

 

My Mother, My Mirror

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Woman Cleaning MirrorI had lunch with my mother on Saturday to celebrate her birthday and I found myself scared to go. You see, on our last lunch occasion – to celebrate my birthday – I found myself being criticized and judged for my lifestyle choices. I was blamed for bringing perimenopause upon myself as well as my water line break and troubles with my homeowners association.

 

I know my mother meant well. That in her way, she was expressing concern over what was happening in my life. But as my counselor said, her delivery sucked. Is it any wonder I dreaded this month's lunch?

 

Yet, gone was the criticism this time around. Instead, she talked about the fact that her brother had just died and her sister blamed her for it. That she hadn't had a day off in months and was putting in 10-hour days every day, trying to replenish her savings account and get back in her feet financially.

 

The parallels between her life and mine did not go unnoticed. Her sister blames her for things that aren't her fault just as she blames me for things that are not mine. She is just beginning to pay me back for a loan I gave her last Fall, as I am still paying off my credit card bills for my recent water line break repair.

 

But it's more than that. Last week, I worked with my peer coach and best friend Kami to discover that in the past, I've defined my worth by what I do rather than who I am because: 1) what I do makes me feel significant, and 2) do-ing allows me to escape from any uncomfortable emotions I might feel while be-ing and helps me avoid conflict and confrontation over my feelings. Yet, that's no way to live life.

 

What I finally realized today is that I inherited these tendencies from my parents. My mother is my mirror. And as much as I may wish to clean off the reflective surface and not see her looking back at me, I have some work to do. Because right now, it could have been me having a conversation with my daughter when I'm 68 talking about my 10-hour-a-day, 7-day-a-week job. It could have been me blaming someone for something she did not do – or, even worse, blaming myself.

 

And that frightened me. Because I don't want to be suppressing my feelings, placing blame where it does not belong, and working as a coping mechanism when I'm 68. I don't even want to be doing those things at 41. Yet, here I am.

 

The difference is that I see these tendencies in myself, I know where they came from, and I am armed with the skills and knowledge to break old patterns and move forward with my life.

 

So what am I going to do about these lessons?

  • Dive back into self-love, self-care, and self-appreciation. I am so much more than what I can do for people. Sometimes I need a reminder – healer heal thyself and all that. J
  • Dive into my emotions – even, and most especially, the uncomfortable ones. I plan to start with daily emotional check-ins and nightly journaling about what went on that day that brought up an emotion. Our departmental administrative assistant died over the weekend. She was in her 20s. This saddens me and brings up other thoughts about death and dying as I am nearing the 5th anniversary of my father’s death. You can be sure I will be diving into my sadness and grief tonight. I don’t want to keep carrying it around with me; yet, I know I will if I don’t face it head on. That being said, I don’t plan to get swept away by my grief. I know I have the ability and skill set to pull back into third-party/psychologist mode if I find myself entering pity party land!

 

What lessons have you learned from your mother? How have these lessons made a positive impact on your life? What changes will you make so that you don’t repeat her old patterns?

But My Feelings Were Silent Inside, You See

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

Young woman showing quiet handsignLast week we talked about intimacy (Into Me You See) and how intimacy is not sex, not love. It is its own construct. Yet, it is more than just seeing into another person. It is hearing and listening to them. It’s feeling like you can speak your truth and not be judged. Like you can speak your mind and hold nothing back out of fear.

I was a guest on The Rebooted Body this morning and the host Kevin and I were talking about how adults born in our generation, most especially women, were taught that children should be seen, not heard. That their voice didn’t matter. And many of us kept this way of thinking as we grew up. Feelings should be suppressed, especially the negative ones. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. But what if we were hurt by an interaction? Were we not supposed to speak up about our pain? Were we to remain there hurt, silent, and go on with our lives as though nothing had happened? For many of us, yes. That’s exactly what we believed.

When I was married, my ex-husband never asked about my day. He didn’t want to hear about it – he actually told me that on more than one occasion. He felt free to tell me in excruciating detail about his day, mind you, but he didn’t want to hear about mine. Apparently wives should be seen, not heard as well.

And so I kept it all in. My feelings were silent inside, you see.

But they weren’t, not really. When your feelings are forced down, suppressed, they are still there. And they are in no way silent. On the outside you may present a calm front, the eye of the storm; but on the inside, a war is raging. A war of anger, fear, contempt, resentment. Your feelings wanting to get out, wanting to be heard. But I wouldn’t let them.

My feelings were silent inside, you see.

Until one day when I could hold it in no longer. One day when I realized my Inner Goddess was going to be heard, no matter what. That was when my life turned upside down, felt apart, shattered.

But I came out of it, voice intact, a much stronger woman than I was before. Is the programming of “seen not heard” gone? No. The Universe frequently gets its jollies by putting men in my path who love nothing more than the sound of their own voice. Men who never once ask about my day. The difference is, those men are no longer welcome in my life.

My feelings are no longer silent inside, you see.

And I have found that when you say what you feel, sometimes that upsets certain people – especially the ones who like to talk about themselves incessantly. Their voice is threatened, apparently, by someone else speaking. But those are not the type of people I want in my life anyway. So good riddance, I say.

My feelings are no longer silent inside, you see.

As a woman, I know I have struggled with self-expression. Feeling like it is okay to share my feelings. To let people know when they’ve hurt me. To listen to my own voice and trust it. If you suffer from this as well, I encourage you to listen to my free audio: Self-Love: The Art of Self-Expression (How to Say What You Mean without Fear of Rejection).

Doubting My Path

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | No Comments

dawns readingLast week, I shared a powerful release ceremony with you that I used on New Year’s Eve to heal my heart. After releasing 2013, I spent New Year’s Day planning and prepping for 2014. (If you haven’t done that yet, I highly recommend Leonie Dawson’s Life and Biz planners! I use them every year!)

But I found myself stuck, unsure of what I want to create in 2014, unsure of my life’s path. After the turbulence that was 2013 and the end of my sabbatical, I find myself at a loss. Yes, I have goals. But when you’re working full time and none of your goals have to do with your current job, when are you supposed to find time to accomplish those goals?

Then it hit me. Something has to give.

I was fortunate enough to be asked to tea with a group of powerfully intuitive women on Saturday. One of them offered to read my cards using the Moon Oracle Deck. As the deck features not only the phases of the moon but several of the Goddesses featured on this site, I couldn’t pass that opportunity up.

The question I had in mind when drawing my cards was, “What should I do with my business in 2014?”

I had the reader do a Past – Present – Future reading for me, which helps illustrate how your past informs what is happening today, which will inform possible future courses of action.

I didn’t like what the cards had to tell me. They were dead on, mind you, but they only served to make me more confused than I was going in.

The first column of cards represents the past. In bold red and black hues, the past revealed that the masks I was wearing had come off (which makes sense given my Rude Awakening in April 2013), I had escaped my prison (hello divorce!), and I had spent a considerable amount of time resting and recharging (thanks to my broken heel).  All good so far.

The middle column represents my present. Bathed in earthly greens, I have accepted a responsibility to and for myself and am choosing to marry myself rather than my job or significant other. In doing so, I must pull from Athena’s wisdom and courage and practice self-love and self-care in all things. It’s not an easy lesson to accomplish, but one I have been actively working on for months.

The last column in reds and purples threw me for a loop. It warned against me getting too competitive in my business – which I strive not to be despite what marketing gurus tell you. If you read down the line of cards, the message is clear: if I get competitive, my palace (house, business, world) will turn upside down and people will try to manipulate me. When I drew another card for clarification, Ishtar, Goddess of Boundaries, came up, warning me to set my boundaries early and clearly to avoid my possible future.

Being a people-pleaser and “yes” woman, the idea of setting boundaries – as much as I know I need to – truly scares me. The first place I went was to one of giving up. As in, if I just give up my business and go back to being solely a professor, I can avoid all of this. Of course, my Inner Goddess loudly objected to that idea. Still, I’ve come so far and knowing that I am dealing with people that don’t have my best interests at heart is frightening.

So what am I doing? I’m journaling, contemplating, trying to figure out how to best achieve balance in my various businesses and between my work and personal life. You can bet that I will be calling on Athena and Ishtar quite often in the coming year and that I will be avoiding competition and those who advocate it like the plague! In the meantime, I am halfway through Leonie Dawson’s workbooks and I’m okay with that. I feel I need to sit with the goals I wrote down and reflect upon whether they are realistic or not and whether they have my best interest at heart.

I do so from a place of Love, knowing that my Inner Goddess has my back and will always steer me to the right decision. All I have to do is open my heart, trust, and say Yes to Her wisdom!

 

Featured GODDESS: Isis

By | Featured Goddess | No Comments

Ancient egyptian woman

Isis

Goddess of Motherhood, Magic, and Fertility

“The magic you seek is within you. Call upon me to help uncover your greatest strengths.”

 

 

 

 

Traits Isis Embodies:

  • Fertility
  • Nurturing
  • Magic
  • Inner Wisdom
  • Inner Knowing

 

How to call on Isis:

[Okay, this story is kind of gross, but you’ll understand why she was Goddess of Motherhood, Magic, and Fertility.] After Isis’ brother Set murdered her husband Osiris and cut him into 14 pieces (those ancient Egyptians were vengeful!), Isis trekked across the world to find the pieces of her husband Set had scattered. Having found 13 of the 14 pieces, Isis used her magic to put Osiris back together and then sought the help of the God Thoth to craft the missing piece (Osiris’ penis). Fully equipped (!), Osiris was able to impregnate Isis. She then gave birth to the skygod Horus. Call upon Isis when you need help calling upon your inner magic to fertilize and give birth to your dreams.

 

Prayer to Isis:

 Isis, Great Mother, Goddess of Magic and Wisdom,

Hear my prayer!

I am having trouble with [insert problem here]

I need to unlock my inner wisdom

So I can resolve this issue and give birth to a better version of myself

Please show me the way.

Thank you Isis!

 Say this prayer right before bed as the answer you seek will likely come to you in a dream.

 

Tribute to Isis:

Isis’ symbol was the star and her flower, the rose. Plant a rose plant in your back yard or on a pot on your back patio under the light of the moon and stars and watch your life flourish!

 

Tuning Into the Wisdom of Your Heart

By | Goddess Wisdom, Wisdom Blog | 4 Comments

heart broken openGrowing up, I was taught that logic should win over intuition, science over ‘gut feelings’, brains over heart. But that left me feeling rather cold and unnourished and felt too ‘masculine’ and ‘academic.’

Deciding to drop everything this past Fall so I could focus on my healing, I rediscovered something unexpected: my heart. Buried under layers of hurt and old wounds, I had sheltered my heart so I wouldn’t get hurt. That’s how I was able to stay in a loveless and unfulfilling marriage, how I was able to keep doing a job that didn’t feed my soul, how I survived.

But when the Universe keeps hitting you with Cosmic 2x4s – my divorce, move, breaking my heel for the second time in two years – something has to give. I’ve shared how I had to change my thinking to focus more on be-ing instead of do-ing, how I’ve had to re-learn how to walk in my power, and how I’ve had to learn to let go and trust the Universe to provide. But what I neglected to do was to throw my heart into the mix. I was scared. I didn’t want to get hurt again. I thought if I protected my heart, I would – in turn – protect myself. I was wrong.

Something happened to me in late November. Three months after getting a divorce and moving, I met a man. I wasn’t looking. I didn’t want a relationship. I wanted to focus on healing. And then he walked in my front door. Literally.

And my little heart that had been hidden beneath those layers of pain broke open. And re-awakened. And hurt. Goddess, how it hurt. But I realized that that’s what I needed. You can’t heal – not truly – while keeping your heart sheltered. You have to open up and put everything on the table, knowing your heart might need to get broken again in the process for you to truly heal the past wounds.

And let me tell you, there have been days when all I wanted to do was slam the door to my heart shut again. Days when it just hurt too much. Days when I was blinded by my tears.

And so I journaled and painted and am working through my old wounds. Is it comfortable? No. Does it need to be done? Absolutely.

As another year comes to a close, I encourage you to examine your heart. Are there any wounds that need to be healed? Are there any past grievances that need to be forgiven? Any old grudges that need to be let go of?

This year we are fortunate enough to have New Year’s Day fall on a New Moon. Before you go out and celebrate New Year’s Eve, I encourage you to hold a release ceremony to let go of any past hurts, wounds, and grievances so you can begin your New Year with a clean slate.

Ask your heart the following questions and journal her answers:

1)      What wounds do you still carry?

2)      What grievances or grudges do you still hold?

3)      How are these serving you?

4)      Are you ready to forgive, let go, and move on?

5)      What do you want to let go of? (Be specific.) Who do you need to forgive? (Don’t forget to include yourself on your forgiveness list.)

Release Ceremony

Get out a blank piece of paper and fold it into three parts. On the first part, write: I forgive. Then list the names of everyone you need and want to forgive. On the second part, write: I let go of. Write down everything you need to let go of. On the final portion, write: I release. Write down everything you need to release. Re-read your paper to make sure you didn’t leave anything out.

Once you are satisfied, get out a lighter (or match) and fire proof container. Rip your paper into the three parts along your folds. Light the first part on fire, dropping it into your fire proof container, saying: I forgive you. Once that has burned completely, light the second strip, saying: I choose to let you go. Once that has burned, light the final piece, saying: I release you, I release you, I release you.

Sit in silence for a few minutes.

Get your journal back out. Write down everything you want to attract in the New Year. Keep this list somewhere safe but where you’ll see it often – in your wallet or purse, perhaps. Look at it often to remind yourself not only of what you’ve let go of but what you want to attract into your life.

Let your thoughts, feelings, and actions follow your dreams.

Happy New Year!