That’s a good question.
I think the answer may differ slightly for every woman, but I think there are a few key traits/qualities that will surface for most women. Things like: accepting and loving yourself for who you are, not settling for less than you deserve, and asking for what you want and then being open to receive it.
I think it serves us to get crystal clear on our answer to both “What is a Queen?” and “How do I become one?” I suggested four questions that might serve you in last week’s ezine. I elaborate on them here and give you my answers as well as my “bare minimums.”
Questions to Ask Yourself:
- Who do I want to be? (Notice that I phrased all of this in the present): For me the answer is a fun, free, dedicated, mindful, happy, sexy, sensual, sovereign, self-sufficient Goddess Warrior Queen who knows and asks for what she wants. I am fair and honest, take exquisite care of myself, am a good listener, as well as a good speaker. I am a woman who gets her needs met, power-full, yet also a woman who gives freely of herself (to those who deserve my gifts). I am collaborative rather than competitive. I set boundaries in my life so I can give more of myself and live full up. I am a good partner to my King. I am intuitive and trust my intuition. I am joy-full. I accept and love myself completely. I live a balanced life. I am confident, BodyLoving, and ask for help when I need it.
- What do I need to be that woman? I need to eat well and make sure I stay well-nourished, get adequate sleep, and rest and “me” time. I also need to move my body every day, be it hiking, yoga, weight lifting, running, or belly dance. I meditate to keep me calm and centered. I need to feel supported, safe, protected, valued, and cherished.
- When do I feel this way naturally? I feel good and am more in my Queenhood when my needs are met.
- When can’t I be who I want to be? When I haven’t gotten enough sleep or enough to eat.
So it all boils down to getting my needs met. I decided to make a list of my “bare minimums;” things I know I need on a regular basis that help me be the woman I want to be.
For me these are:
- Eating nourishing meals 5-6 times per day
- 8-9 hours of sleep each night
- Daily outdoor time
- Daily yoga
- Meditate twice daily
- One hour of down time each evening before bed
- Go to the gym 4-5 times per week
- Belly dance 4-5 times per week
- Do whatever it takes to feel supported, safe, valued, protected and cherished
- Unplug by 6pm each night
- Daily connection with my girlfriends